GUSA Passes Resolution Commending GUSA for Resolution-Passing Skills
HEALY—In a move hailed as a major accomplishment for Georgetown’s student government by members of Georgetown’s student government, the Georgetown University Student Association passed a resolution last week praising its own aptitude and propensity for passing resolutions.
“Georgetown students want to know, what has GUSA done for me lately?” GUSA President Calen Angert (MSB ’11) said. “Well, now they know. And you’re welcome.”
By Angert’s estimation, the current GUSA Senate is one of the most effective resolution-passing body in Georgetown’s 220 year history, allowing it to eschew what Angert said are more time-consuming and less rewarding tasks like holding elections more competently than a third-world country and addressing issues that affect students’ lives.
“Like the saying goes, if not now, then when?” Angert said. “If not us, then who? And if not through a verbose, ultimately inconsequential resolution, then how?”
The resolution was proposed and ratified during a meeting that saw the passage of nine other resolutions, four amendments to GUSA’s constitution, and two calls for cheers of “Hip, hip, hooray!” to congratulate individual senators.
GUSA passed the resolution unanimously by a vote of 6-0, with 28 GUSA senators absent. Three senators spoke extemporaneously in favor of the resolution, one quoting Jeremy Benthem’s “The Principles of Morals and Legislation” and Federalist Papers numbers 15, 27, and 51 at length, while the remaining three senators played Solitaire.
Resolution co-sponsor Andre Post (SFS ’12) credited the success of the vote to a Facebook group he started as the resolution was being debated titled “Resolution Now! One Million Strong for the Resolution Now! Facebook Group.” By the time of the vote, four of the six senators who supported the bill were members.
“Social networking,” Post said. “Web 2.0. Facebook. Young people.”
The resolution cites previous resolutions such as one supporting the creation of a working group to study the effectiveness of working groups, another containing only the Georgetown fight song in all capital letters, and a recent impromptu resolution calling for more beverage choices at GUSA meetings.
“At our meeting last week, [GUSA Senator] Phil [Billingham (COL ‘12)] remarked about how he was tired of drinking the same mix of Red Bull and espresso that we make for every meeting,” GUSA Senator Gregory Johnson (COL ‘11) said. “And I said, hold on, let’s do something about this. He looked at me and I at him and then we knew. Boom! Resolution time.
“Great minds,” Johnson added. “Great minds.”
According to Angert, GUSA will likely vote on a slew of additional resolutions next week.
“We’re grappling with many pressing questions, all relevant to the Georgetown student body, all deserving their own resolution,” Angert said. “If the Constitution and the Magna Carta got in a fight, who would win? How can we get the GUSA logo onto GUGS’s grills? What’s everybody up to this weekend? Any fun parties going down?”
