Wattad Transfers to Bench on Healy Lawn

CAMPUS — Sophomore guard Omar Wattad announced yesterday his intention to transfer to the bench on Healy Lawn. Sports analysts and students speculated that the move was related Wattad’s desire for a warmer environment and the late afternoon setting of the sun. Wattad claimed that while his old bench was a nice, it was “too crowded” and that he needed “a bench where [he] can have more freedom.” Hoya basketball coach John Thompson III could not be reached for comment, but a spokesperson from the Athletic Department said, “We wish Omar the best of luck on his new bench. He’ll be missed by someone probably.”