Georgetown UIS Urges Students To Destroy All Technology

Georgetown UIS Urges Students To Destroy All Technology

GEORGETOWN — Citing a recent surge in malware attacks, including the powerful “Heartbleed” security breech, Georgetown Chief Information Officer Lisa Davis urgently requested all Georgetown students destroy their technology. At a sparsely-attended emergency press conference in the UIS Executive Office on Wednesday Davis outlined how the crisis unfolded: “at first we requested everyone change their password, but... »

Relay for Choice Fights Back Against Conservative Causes

Relay for Choice Fights Back Against Conservative Causes

HARBIN FIELD — Students from all backgrounds descended upon Harbin Field on Friday night to join the Georgetown University College Democrats and H*yas for Choice in the 8th annual “Relay for Choice.” The event, one of Georgetown’s largest events, has managed to raise over $1.4 million... »

J.J.’s Bones Uncovered Beneath Copley Lawn

The Georgetown community was rocked by scandal yesterday after students uncovered an unmarked grave beneath the surface of Copley Lawn containing the presumed remains of former mascot-in-training, J.J. The grave was discovered by Alex Ortega (SFS ’15), a cutter on the Georgetown Ultimate Frisbee team.... »

Support Relay for Cirrhosis

Support Relay for Cirrhosis

Hello, dear readers. We here at The Heckler love a good joke. But today, we would like to take a moment to talk to you about something of a more serious nature. It’s an issue that has struck deeply at the heart of our... »

The Heckler Infographic: Dahlgren Chapel Renovations

The Heckler Infographic: Dahlgren Chapel Renovations

The Dahlgren Chapel of the Sacred Heart will be rededicated this Saturday after over twelve months of renovations. Here are some of the new features students can expect to see in the chapel: Magnetic locks on doors will prevent bad Catholics from leaving after Communion Chapel... »

Pleasure Place Closing; Gag Gifts Reserve Running Low

Pleasure Place Closing; Gag Gifts Reserve Running Low

GEORGETOWN — As he notified he the world this week, Pleasure Place Owner Frankie Carlondie’s store will be closing up shop in the near future. This announcement set off a panic among students on the hilltop who were in need of gag gifts. “This closure... »

Georgetown Rejected Student’s Weekend Draws Low Attendance

Georgetown Rejected Student’s Weekend Draws Low Attendance

WASHINGTON — Calling it a “sad sight” the President of Georgetown’s Rejected Students Program  (GRSP) Andrea Friori (SFS ’16) lamented the low attendance of last weekend’s Rejected Student’s Weekend. At a press conference, Friori described the weekend as “a moment of soul searching for what our organization... »

Breaking: Rice and an Unknown Substance Found in McCarthy Hall

Tuesday federal authorities were notified that an illicit substance was found in a Georgetown Residence Hall.  This reporter had the chance to interview Terry York, a sophomore who claims to have been evacuated from the floor where this substance was found.  This is my... »

Search Continues for Missing Georgetown University Flight to NCAA Tournament

WASHINGTON –In what is being called “the biggest aviation mystery of the century”, the disappearance of Flight 726A transporting the Georgetown University Hoya basketball team to their first round match in the NCAA Men’s Division I Championship continues to baffle both tournament officials and... »